by Heide Dangelo
Megan Fenyoe is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), Mindset Coach, Veteran, and the creator of the International “I am Enough” movement aimed at defeating the “I am not good enough” mindset. She knows what it is like and how difficult it can be to get out of bed in the morning when life seems to be crumbling around us and how our negative thoughts can control every area of our lives. As she has been through countless disappointments, abuse, and neglect from childhood to adulthood and divorce. She began to feel a nudging in her soul to do something more with her life yet she couldn’t figure out what that something was, till now she started the “I am enough” movement where it is aimed to help others to overcome self-limiting beliefs.
What has been so fascinating and so relevant that the publisher of Influential People Magazine, Heide Hargreaves also wrote a book called “Statements of Power” a pocket-sized guidebook that physically shows the most common negative statements on the left side of the page and the right side has the most common positive replacement statements we should use. Where it also demonstrated “I am not good enough” to “I am good enough” statements to help retrain the mindset of self-limiting beliefs.
IPM: Since everyone deals with this “I’m not enough” mindset. What can we do to get over that mindset?
Megan: I talk about this exact question in my book. Have you ever stopped and thought about the stories you might be telling yourself over and over again? Do you ever catch yourself saying, “I’m not good at sales” or “I’m not good with numbers?”
If you’ve been working on improving your mindset for your busi- ness or career, then you may already be aware of some of these negative beliefs and stories running in the background. But what about the negative beliefs you have with regards to your health? What sort of things do you say to yourself about your body? Are these stories helping you or holding you back?
The stories we tell ourselves create our subconscious identity. For example, thoughts like, “I am not the kind of person who can live on green smoothies” or “I am just not athletic enough to go running,” are only holding you back from becoming healthier.
Although willpower can help (and is needed) to start new healthy habits, eventually your actions will reflect the beliefs you have about yourself. Your subconscious works to align your actions with your personal beliefs and identity. But you can use these stories to your advantage too. If you start believing that exercise makes you happier and productive, you will make it a point to move more each day; you will make time for exercise. Healthy actions and habits become easier once they are aligned with the belief that you are someone who makes healthy choices. So, get rid of the “I’m not good enough” self-talk.
If you remember from my personal story I shared at the beginning of the book, I struggled with this mindset for years—especially when it came to my ex-husband. I always thought I wasn’t good enough, because if I was, he never would’ve had an affair. He never would’ve divorced me. This was the hardest to change; to change my thoughts of not being good enough to I am enough.
How did I do it? I practiced every… single… day multiple times a day to combat that thought by reminding myself of the good things about myself and the good things happening in my life. No matter what happens in my life—good, bad, or downright awful—I am the only one who can make myself feel “not good enough.” I can now say with
100% certainty that I am enough for me and that is all that matters.
Swap the Negative Self-Talk with a Positive Mindset to Become Healthier and start becoming more aware. Write down the things that you are telling yourself about your health, career, relationships, and whatever you may be struggling with. Sometimes you have to take more than a few minutes to think about these negative messages. Anytime you find yourself having a negative thought, write it down.
Next, write out a positive affirmation about yourself and place it somewhere that you will be able to see it every day. When you hear yourself thinking or saying negative things, replace them by repeating a positive affirmation such as:
“I am someone who takes one step every day towards becoming a business owner.”
“I am someone who is making healthy food choices each day to reach my weight loss goal.”
Remember, your self-talk creates your reality. Be aware of what you are saying to yourself.
IPM: Can you share with us your short story what got you involved with this movement?
Megan: I have gone through many struggles throughout my life most recently being involved in a narcissistic abusive marriage ended and having financial struggles, I was left traumatized and this is when I began questioning if I was enough. Questioning if I was good enough to ever be in a loving relationship, to be an entrepreneur, to have a successful speaking career, etc. For many years I was living a life without meaning and purpose.
Being a Mental Health Therapist for the last 16 years, I had to begin using the skills I have taught hundreds of my clients and begin working on believing I was enough. This took a lot of visualization work and even getting the words “I am enough” tattooed on my body. I began repeating this simple phrase day in and day out. I began truly believing she was enough.
This is when I began writing my best-selling book You Are Enough: 5 Steps to Move from Struggle To Strength which was published in August 2018. Through this book, I was able to become the best-selling author and began visualizing how I wanted to make an impact in this world.
For me being enough is about knowing that at the end of the day all that matters how we make a difference in this world. It is pulling up our bootstraps and trying again. It’s crying when we need to cry and laughing when we need to laugh. It is learning to give yourself grace. Yes, grace.
IPM: As you mentioned before about having affirmation written on a paper and leaving it in various places where you can see it as a visual coping. Can you tell me about that?
Megan: Visual coping is a form of CBT treatment. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is a therapeutic approach that seeks to modify negative or self-defeating thoughts and behavior. CBT is aimed at both thought and behavior change. CBT approaches use cognitive and/or behavioral strategies to identify and replace irrational beliefs with rational beliefs.
At times it is difficult to get out of our head so implementing visual coping skills helps distract your mind your racing negative thoughts and focus on what you are reading. In my book, I share some visual coping skills including creating vision boards and/or trigger cards.
A while back, I ran across a story about Jim Carrey, the famous comedic actor. In a blog post in Neatorama.com, the author wrote about how Jim was broke and struggling thespian once upon a time, so he took a blank check and made it out to himself. He wrote it in the amount of $10 million. He dated it 10 years from that moment. Each day he looked at his “trigger card” and knew that he would achieve his goal. In a decade, he was earning more than $10 million.
In the same way, you can use numerous things as your “trigger card.” Making a trigger card is one of the best ways that has made a profound difference in my life. I’m able to interpret negative, toxic thoughts simply by reading my “I Am Enough” card. I repeat what I wrote on my card as to “why I am enough” over and over again to help me to get back on track towards achieving my biggest goals at the moment. I have hundreds of clients, friends, etc. who use trigger/coping cards daily.
If you are needing some additional guidance to help you visualize your passion and purpose please visit my website at www.meganfenyoe.com for free download of resources to help you, including a gratitude journal, meditation guides, mindset workbook, free video training, webinars and so much more!
You can also text the word ENOUGH to 31996 and receive your free 5 Step Checklist and my Top 100 Affirmations.
IPM: What made you decided to launch this movement?
Megan: I created the “I Am Enough Movement” as a way to give back. The foundation for the “I Am Enough Movement” is to find joy and live a life filled with more hope, happiness, and with less worry, angst, and those nights wondering if we measure up – well, the foundation is first of all-knowing in our hearts that we are enough.
Since launching the movement 5 months ago I have sent cards to 23 states and 9 countries. My goal is to reach all 50 states by the end of September.
To order your FREE I Am Enough Movement cards simply visit https://www.iamenoughmovement.info
You can also order your I Am Enough shirt by visiting http://iamenoughmovement.info/i-am-enough-t-shirts/
You can also view all the selfies of people all over the world supporting the movement on Instagram at @enough_movement_
Thank you so much for getting out of your comfort zone and making it happen for others because it is causing a big movement for those who need it.
http://meganfenyoe.com FB: Megan R Fenyoe
Linkedin: Megan Fenyoe Instagram: Megsn.Fenyoe
Blonde Bombshell Podcast: http://www.blondebombshell.libsyn.com
I Am Enough Movement: https://www.iamenoughmovement.info
Megan R. Fenyoe is an Air Force Veteran, Licensed Mental Health Therapist (LCSW), Speaker and Trainer, Host of The Blonde Bombshell Podcast and Founder of the I Am Enough Movement.
Megan is an Amazon Best Selling Author who recently published her book You Are Enough: 5 Steps to Move from Struggle To Strength. Megan has been featured on SiriusXM Radio including the Jenny McCarthy show, TV/Radio Shows, multiple podcasts, as well as various magazines.
Being a Mental Health Therapist for over 15 years as well as a Transformational Mindset Coach, Megan has both the personal and professional experience to help you up-level your negative self-talk into positive self-empowerment. You will come to know: You Are Enough!
While “Enough-ness” feels like a miracle, it is a proven 5 Step System that Megan guides you through which will move you from struggle to strength.
Through coaching, leadership, consulting, and speaking engagements, Megan has helped hundreds of people accurately assess their challenges and identify ways they can change – capitalizing on the strengths they already have while building new ones.
About The Author
